Tuesday, March 3, 2009
My baby experienced her first break up yesterday night (via text, what is this world coming too) and it was horrible.
I don't know who felt worse, the bewildered 15 year-old who, "just doesn't understand, I don't know what I did wrong mom!" to her 35 year old mother who just wants to punch that kid in the face and tell him how wonderful her child is and how lucky he was to have her except . . .
this entire experience has made me realize that secretly I don't want her dating yet, this world is way to harsh and this has forced me to understand the reality that I cannot protect my babies from everything and that my "motherbear" reflex (you know ripping someones head off for my child's wounded heart) will not fix everything, nor is it necessary.
I cried for my daughter last night. I cried because she had to experience this heartbreak, I cried because I couldn't do anything but hold her, I cried because I love her so much and she is getting so big, but mostly I cried because this will happen again and I will still feel helpless and ill-equipped to handle this situation and that really creates a vacuum.
Have a good day friends and family.
I said a prayer for each one of you and hope that the love scars you carry from youth to now are healed and barely noticeable. I know mine are and I am thankful for that.
love you all (especially my own scar-remover Jeremiah)